"Dr. Hofmann got off the bicycle, a Wilde surmise dawning upon him: Each man spills the drink he loves... there is no beginning, no ending, no linear progression, only an unbounded net of jewels each of which reflects and contains the reflection of each of the others."
- Robert Anton Wilson

God Winking

How to serve & honor the synchronicities best?
Weave the synchronicities into ...(?) Combined with …(?)
an honest, modest 1st person account;
a message to the Whole;
a message about a new perception
I am always alone.
Freedom is Free.
Every piece is unique. Every piece is the same.
In is out. Out is in.
No one I know seems correct to address. Who would understand? Who would care? Who would be bored or turned away?
I know I don’t know you but I know you must be much the same as me.
I write this to you because I need someone to write to, because I have some things to say that may move, inspire, elate or awaken you and someone else.
There is then. All is here now.

Russel Targ: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EwNuylu41tQ: Nonlocal awareness independent of space & time is what we are.  We are all remote viewers.  Close your eyes.  Quiet your mind.  Describe the surprising pictures that appear in your awareness

~ Sonny

Monday, December 7, 2015
022716j God winks at me a lot.

Probably He&She winks at you, too. If so, what do you make of it?

Seems to me the winks are all indications that this is my personal universe. Not that your universe isn't entirely yours. Just that your universe is included in mine; and this universe is entirely mine, I can see. In fact, I believe it is me, as the limits to my selfhood 'exist' only in my imagination.

God appears to be the winker and I the winkee, but there are no actual fences between God and me; and, all the winking attests to this.

All of existence may just be One Big Wink containing zillions of fractal mini-winks appearing to occur once in a while or all the time and everywhere, relatively. In fact, I think it is. Don't you? How else could any of it or it all make any sense (wink, wink)?

Anyway, God winks at me a lot - way more and often than this phenomenon seems to be reflected or acknowledged in our consensus chatter and world view - so I decided to document some of my winks, mostly during the last year or so.

Do you pretend that you don't yet know what I'm talking about? Well, be not concerned. This little book is itself a wink to you; and, it will herald more winks to you very soon, guaranteed. It's the way it works.

050314j56 102814m42 While it is true that 'I' is either a hoax or 'it' includes All, we can and will, nonetheless, pretend that 'I' is a separate enity from you; and, who you may perceive in any particular dreamy moment, if you were looking at and talking to me, as me, the transcriber of this document.

In truth, you are one of my faces and the same pure awareness shines through your face as It does through 'mine' (and I see you when I see you this way), but here and hereafter, 'you' will be presumed to be whatever and whomever you think you are.

042115x56 From the smallest microbe to the largest quasar cluster, It is all connected to me; parts of me and mine. As the world is in my mind, I am fundamental; and, It would all be gone were I no more; if it were possible for me to be non-existent, which it is not. What will follow are (in some cases, quite) personal reports. As this is not a work of fiction, no names have been changed. Please be easy in judgment on my candor.

Whenever the world or the universe is alluded to or mentioned, it is mine I'm referring to. You can feel free to call it yours, if you wish. We are both actors (as well as other roles) in this grand play.

The stars shine for you as they shine for me.


Sunday, July 26, 2015
050314e16 In the last 11 years, I have been romantically involved with exactly four women - intensley with two; barely with the other two - all of whom are fire horses born in 1966.

From 2004 through most of 2011, I was married to Leigh, a Sagittarius.

Sarala (another Sagittarian) is a very attractive dark haired New Zealander woman who lives in Tiruvannamalai, India. I met her when I was there in March of 2012. We went to dinner and on walks several times over a month or so. Though I think she would have been willing, we never kissed. Leigh was still too much in my heart and mind.

April (a Taurus) is a waitress in a pasta house very near to me. For pretty much the first two years after I returned from India, I had a crush on her. Managed to get her to go out with me three times - a year in between each date. It always seemed to me that we had a good time, but she always reported that the spark wasn't there for her. We never kissed either, despite the fact that I sure thought I would like to have.

Molly is a Gemini who I have been with since July 29, 2014. She is an incredibly intuitive person. Before I ever mentioned anything to her regarding any aspirations I had about writing anything, she predicted and reiterated several times over our first few months that I was going to write something and either be well into it or finished with it by the end of 2015.

This book is dedicated to Molly and Leigh.

121114y56 052014u49 Leigh came home from a hot August Sun Dance four years ago and announced that she was leaving me. Nearly six months later, the scene of our parting was a foggy early morning with her standing outside of the customs area waving to me just before I turned, tears falling from my eyes with a broken heart, to board the first plane on my trip to Mumbai.

In that very moment, Skeeter Davis was singing End of the World over the airport sound system. There could have been no more perfect song right then. That was my favorite song in 1963 and a much cherished song all my life. Who knows how many years it had been since I'd last heard it?

We interact very infrequently these days. Back in March, there were two or three emails back and forth between us around my father's medical calamity, in which I was sending out daily reports about it to close friends and family each of the ten days he was hospitalized.

In the last of these emails, Leigh very eloquently said to me: "I also want to reiterate that you are incredibly gifted with words and you should write and be published. I find myself self-conscious whenever I respond to your emails because they lack the graceful elegance that yours do."

072414i "Wow!", I thought. It was around then that I started putting this book together.

Synchronicitous Universe

Tuesday, April 21, 2015; 11:38am
larry-carlson-0bd_o 042115q 080215s53 As you know, the so-called dark side of the Moon is only and always dark to us. Though the Moon is fully in shadow as viewed from Earth and we can't see it, the side of the Moon facing us during a New Moon is the same as any other moon phase, such as a Full Moon when we can see the entire face.

If the Moon didn't spin at all, then eventually it would show its far side to the Earth while moving around our planet in orbit. However, since the rotational period is exactly the same as the orbital period (an effect I found out is known as captured or synchronous rotation), the same portion of the Moon's sphere is always facing the Earth.

Somebody living on the other side of the Moon would have day and night, but wouldn't know that Earth exists at all.

081414o49 To the Earth, the Moon is a knuckleball, floating out there in space.

Presuming the fact that we always only see one side of the Moon must be a colossal coincidental anomaly, I did a google search and got as far as "why do we only” when google came up with “see only one side of the moon”, which is what I wanted.

Mainstream astronomy says that the Moon became “tidally locked” to the Earth 4 billion years ago and has presented us only one side ever since.

It surprised me to learn that most significant moons in the Solar System are tidally locked with their primaries. When the difference in mass between the two bodies and their physical separation is small, they may even be tidally locked to each other, as is the case between Pluto & Charon. Also, most of the stars we can see in the night time sky are binary or multiple star systems and astronomers expect that close binary stars throughout the universe are tidally locked with each other, too. It turns out that tidal locking is actually the norm; and, predictable via a ridiculously complex mathematical formula! Who woulda known?

What mainstream science doesn't know, includes:
062514b 1. Why it is that the Sun and the Moon are precisely distant that they are to appear from the Earth to be the same size - enabling us to witness both solar and lunar eclipses. According to modern cosmology this is a coincidence.
042815e 2. Why exists the remarkable harmony that one Mercury day is exactly two of Mercury's years, during which time the planet has revolved on its own axis exactly three times.
073114b 3. Why Venus 'kisses' Earth every 584 Earth days, which happens to be nearly exactly five Venus days, as she passes between us and the Sun, making nearly exactly the same face visible from Earth at each close approach. Whether this relationship arose by 'chance' or by some kind of tidal locking with Earth is not known.

What is evident is that it is a synchronicitous universe. Mine is, anyway.


----- Original Message -----
From: Leigh
To: emptydempty
Sent: Sunday, June 02, 2013 7:54 AM
Subject: Re: for what it's worth

You dated a women who had dinner with us the other night. Niya. She is an old frind of Mark's. She had dinner with us (you included) when Beth and Mark first moved here over on Knob HIll. It was Christmas time. Two nights ago she was here and talking about her dating strike outs and said the first guy wanted to know her astrology to see if they had karma together and the second guy was into conspiracy and what a crazy he was. She checked out his website and saw what a nut job he was. We all looked at each other and said, "Sam?" I said you were my ex and that we all had dinner 2 years ago. She was wondering why you looked so familiar. Well, she was pretty embarrased. She said you had a nice face. I couldn't really be around her for very long. She is an extremely me centered person. Small town and small world.
Maybe next time you want to date someone send me her picture and I can let you know if you are wasting your time or not cause I probably know her. :)) I think of you often and pray for your life and well being.

----- Original Message -----
From: emptydempty
To: Leigh
Sent: Sunday, June 02, 2013 9:47 PM
Subject: Re: Nut Job

Has a ring to it, doesn’t it? Yeah, I’d say it is pretty well statistically proven that I am a nut job, so I have no issue with this. There are lots of good citizens who view me as a nut job and who presume that anyone who associates with me must be a nut job and in fact feel like a nut job themselves just standing next to somebody as nut job as me; and, I mean a LOT. Both Niya and I see me as a nut job and neither of us even know me. Beth and Mark and you all see me as a nut job and you all really do (know me, I mean).

Upon reading your email, I was intrigued because I didn’t immediately recall Niya’s name (as I never actually dated her). However, I realized that I must have done her chart and sure enough there she was in my Notoriously Informative Nut Job Accounting* where I discovered she had sat next to me at the bar at the Luigi's a few months ago and I had done her chart. She was attracted to me (or at least my face, amazingly enough) in our first meeting (Ace of Disks), but I never heard from her after I sent her her chart report (which is the norm, as anyone perusing their report will observe that it is posted on a website which is obviously a Nitwit’s Idiotic Nut Job Accumulation*).

As I must be responsible for both ‘dating’ strikes (though I never discussed karma with her), she must also have been one of the several who never followed up after responding to my Nefarious yet Incriminating Nut Job Ad*.

The thing is: Nut jobs like me (and, of course, I am a very particular essentially harmless kind of nut job) see almost everyone to be (at least partially; more commonly almost entirely) hypnotized zombies; and, nut jobs like me want to wake everyone up out of our zombiehood; or, at least, weed those of the female persuasion out from being potential wives or girlfriends. Not to brag, but I’ve been remarkably thorough and successful in this regard. If I was famous, certainly I would be a decent candidate for the nut job hall of fame, even if I do say so myself, as I’ve eliminated almost everybody – (just one to go, namely, me) - even you.

Que sera sera. You are all me, as I am all of you; and, I will say that as long as we all at least avoid getting microchipped, we will all experience nut-job-hood before all is said and done; and, I think we must be getting quite closer to this sur-reality.

Meantime, I appreciate your prayers and it’s nice to chat with you again.

Though my weed out system seems already quite ironclad, I’ll take you up on your offer to forward photos to you, as long as you provide me with the birthdata of any and all love interests who cross your path. Again, I promise not to make personal comments unless you want me to.
*N.I.N.J.A. [National Institution for Nut Jobs Anonymous, for which I am currently the lone and founding member (though we do expect more will follow)]. :))

----- Original Message -----
From: emptydempty
To: Leigh
Sent: Monday, June 03, 2013 7:40 PM
Subject: Nut Job P.S.

modern-nutjob_sm See attached photo of my partial desktop at 7:13 pm this evening. Came home from the store and was just diddling before thinking to take a nap. For no reason, I did a Search on tumblr of the word ‘conspiracy’ and, as you see, came up with 455 hits. The name of the very first site listed? “Modern Nutjob”.


Thursday, April 9, 2015; 11:50am
In between situps and squats in my workout, just after making my protein drink and dropping it on the floor - glass and milk and egg and various powders splattering all over the corner of my kitchen - the phone rang, momentarily pulling me out of shock.

I got to the phone, too late to answer it, but I saw on the screen that it was Michel calling. Stood there for a second, realizing I first needed to clean up the mess; and, then I heard a tapping at my door.

Opening the door a crack; having to be watchful that Maruti doesn't try scooting out - albeit, without cast, he still only has three fully working legs - to find James at the door, saying Michel wanted him to come over and change the lock on her front door.

Michel's front door is just across the exterior entryway to the three units in the back of the main house, nine steps from mine. She is and has been in Seattle for the past month; her boyfriend Michael sometimes staying in her place while she's been gone.

James explained that Michel hadn't heard from Michael in a week - he hadn't responded to phone calls or emails; and, she somehow had found out that he had not appeared at his recent gigs. Michael is a flamenco guitarist who plays at various restaurants in town. A friendly Sagittarian elf, I well enjoyed our happenstance meetings at all hours outside our front doors.

Over the last couple of months, Michael had moved his yurt from the land it had been on for several years, 60 miles south of here, to a nice spot on the north side of town. He wanted to be nearer Michel; and, probably his main reason for taking on the huge project was to escape the prior landlord, who had become increasingly difficult for Michael to get along with. Michael said that the landlord was quite powerful and connected; and, in fact, functioned as the head mason in that area. Earlier in the year, he had presented Michael with a new tenant agreement that asserted that should Michael die, his yurt and sauna would become part of the property. Michael wouldn't sign; and considered the recent completion of his move to be a great personal victory. On three occasions, I helped him put the yurt up.

With the door still cracked, I said I'd be out in a minute. At my feet, Maruti wasn't trying to get out, but the wide-eyed agitated expression on his face registered in my mind that something was very wrong.

After moving Maruti back from the door, I joined James outside and walked with him to Michel's door. We both noticed the swarm of large flies around the top of her door; warning us in our guts to prepare ourselves for what was inside.

James opened the unlocked door to an immediate almost overpowering stench. The heat was on. It felt hellish.

110514n55 Holding our breath we found Michael's dark purple, bloated naked corpse sprawled on its back across the bed.

Michel is an artist and one of her works is a one piece life size sculpture of a man sitting on a chair. This was in the far left corner of the room. Though upright, it looked eerily similar to the corpse.

Michel had called me a few days ago, asking if I'd seen Michael and I said no, I hadn't. Only when the police were here did I walk out to the street to see his car parked to the right a little bit.

Maggie, our other neighbor back here, remarked that she and the last police officer that was here saw a large raptor, way bigger than a hawk, circling above. Later, she smudged; and, reported that she thought it was weird that at several points around the house the sage flared up.

Following is an email I received from Michel last Halloween that I didn't respond to.

----- Original Message -----
From: Michel
To: emptydempty
Sent: Friday, October 31, 2014 10:56 PM
Subject: Reading

reading Hi Sam. This is a card set up that Rick did for me a month ago and said that death was in the reading, sometimes around the backyard party event! He use Alister Crowley's cards! Don't remember the reading maybe you can give me more insight! Thanks! Michel

At the backyard potluck Michel refers to, Michael serenaded us all throughout the late afternoon and evening with his flamenco guitar.

Goodbye, Michael. We all love you.


Wednesday, April 15, 2015
My cat is named after the birth name of Nisargadatta Maharaj, the source of my very favorite wisdom book (my bible), I Am That. Nisargadatta was named after one of the names of Lord Hanuman and he was born on the full moon in April of 1897. Maruti was born on the full moon of April, 115 years later; coincidentally, the very day that I sealed the deal on one of my most valued possessions.

mnfo8fu8uT After patiently waiting through the entire Mercury retrograde period which had ended a couple of days before, on April 6th of 2012, I paid for and arranged shipping from Tiruvannamalai of a 24 inch high bronze Ganesh.

mnfo4fADsz1 It was a month later that I returned to the United States; five weeks after that that Maruti came into my life. Maruti had been with me exactly one week when my Ganesh finally arrived - at Leigh's house, as I had not known what my new address was to be until very shortly before leaving India.

Curiously, my new (and current) address turned out to be the other side of the same duplex I lived in when I met Leigh, a few months before finding a house with her and Zoë, going on 11 years ago.

My last two weeks in India had been spent (recuperating from Varanasi and) relaxing in Rishikesh. While there, my main project was checking craigslist a couple of times a day for a small house to rent; to no avail until three days before I was to leave (to Paris for a week and then home, wherever that was to be). What a surprise it was that it was my former landlady who got back to my inquiry and that I was to be starting over from where I was before.

At 11:29 this morning, I opened the door so that Maruti could come and go for the first time in nearly three months. It pleased me that he waited five minutes at the door before going out; and, that it took him 20 minutes to venture more than a foot away.

Eventually, he began exploring his familiar backyard domain and it was a delight to watch him frolic in the dandelions and sunshine and scratch once again on his favorite tree.

Last night, I pondered that he may never be able to go out again and I went to bed somewhat depressed. He's barely using his still quite atrophied back left leg, but I had decided that if he was properly cautious, the ability to roam will probably be his most efficient physical therapy.

After a couple of hours, I put him back in the house when I left to visit my Dad. When I returned an hour after that, I discovered that he had knocked a couple of the items I had on the ledge in front of his cat door off, so I removed the rest and unblocked his cat door after placing chairs on both the inside and outside so he wouldn't have to jump so far.

He stayed close and was out most of the rest of the afternoon and evening. Near 10 at night, though he was still free, he was very contentedly curled up on the bed behind me after coming in tuckered out on his own a few minutes earlier.

An hour later, on my way to bed, after taking my contacts off and without glasses, rather than find the cat door block, I just shoved the box of cat litter in front of the cat door; thinking, “That will hold him”. We spooned in bed for 10 minutes and I was starting to drift when I perceived Maruti hopping off the bed. Soft sounds seconds later brought me to full consciousness and I turned the light on, grabbed my glasses and exited the bed in short order. Already, he had nudged the box away from the door enough and was gone. I put the cat litter box back where it was and went back to bed. I realized Maruti knows his limitations right now. He’ll be cautious. There’s no transition when it comes to freedom. The door is open and Maruti is free.

It has been a momentous day for me and my cat.

Shiva, Rajani, Sampurna and Moulin Rouge

Monday, Aril 27, 2015
Years before she met me, Leigh lived in the ashram of Baba Hari Das during one chapter of her life. He had given her an Indian name, which she had used at that time, but no longer actively by the time she and I had gotten together.

She of course told me about it, but it never clearly registered in my mind as to spelling or pronunciation other than that it started with 'Raj...' and was beautiful and that I had presumed that it meant 'Queen' of some sacred sort.

----- Original Message -----
From: emptydempty
To: Leigh
Sent: Sunday, April 26, 2015 11:51 PM
Subject: two easy questions

Feeling a little better. Been relying on the MMS, which as you know or will recall requires three times as many drops of citric acid as the MMS in the mix. Remember the two containers you sent with me to India? Well, I'm just coming to the end of both.

Question #1: Where do I buy more of the citric acid? The Co-op?
Question #2: What name did Baba Hari Das give you?

----- Original Message -----
From: Leigh
To: emptydempty
Sent: Monday, April 27, 2015 6:54 AM
Subject: Re: two easy questions

1) We used lemon juice. You had citric acid for your trip Not sure where to get citric acid other than online.
2) Rajani~ why?

----- Original Message -----
From: emptydempty
To: Leigh
Sent: Monday, April 27, 2015 12:48 PM
Subject: Re: two easy questions

For not necessarily any particular reason(s), in the stream of my consciousness over the last three years, multiple times I've indulged in a few seconds of strain in trying to remember that regal divine name of yours. Don't know if I ever knew the spelling. What ever came to my mind was close, I knew, but lacking confirmation and satisfaction. Recently, it gelled enough to think to ask, is all.

Feeling significantly better today, especially with the warm weather that has returned. Doubt I'm infectious anymore.

Put the avi files of the videos on disk for you, in case you'd like to be able to see and store the plays on your computer. Haven't watched them yet, but I did view a few minutes of a couple of Zoë's scenes in Leading Ladies and was impressed.

042215t38 Because there was room, I also put two movies on the disk: Love in the Time of Cholera, which I haven't yet seen; and, Moulin Rouge, which I consider to be one of my favorites. Don't remember if we've ever talked about it or if I had already burned it for you before.

Immediately after seeing the last email, I did a google search for the meaning of the name and the first and only site I read said: "Rajani \r(a)-ja-ni\ as a girl's name is pronounced rah-ZHAH-nee. It is of Hindi and Sanskrit origin, and the meaning of Rajani is "night". Hindu mythology: one of the names of the wife of Shiva."

Now, back when I was in India, specifically when I was in Varanasi towards the latter part of the trip, I consulted with a renowned vedic astrologer and wrote about it my Personal Report #8 from there on April 17th, 2012:

"...After a while, it occurred to me that maybe my best first step would be to find the best college that teaches astrology and get a recommendation there. To my surprised amazement, this turned out to be Sampurnanand Sanskrit University! Either I am on the right track, I thought, or I am again and always participating in God's great divine joke, or both.

"...He also said that I should worship Lord Shiva, chant Om Namah Shivaya and acquire a gold ring with a bright yellow topaz and wear it on my right index finger every Thursday."

Actually, I only mentioned it in the report, but he had emphasized imbibing Shiva into my life many times.

In the three years since being back from India, because of what the professor had told me, I have had a picture of Shiva under the glass on the lower left surface of my desk. It was covered up most of the time with a folded blanket that is Maruti's sometime perch next to me, but had been uncovered for the last three months because of Maruti's broken leg. For the first time since Maruti broke his leg, I had put the blanket back on the desk just this morning. The desk is now uncovered again, since being reminded to imbibe Shiva.

010916r61 042215s49 After reading the meaning of Rajani and discovering that she was the wife of Shiva, I immediately took the blanket back off and then looked for the above mentioned report I had posted, starting with, as it turned out, Personal Report #10, which was submitted from Paris, at the end of my journey, on May 11th, 2012, where I described the Montemartre section of Paris I stayed in: "...Moulin Rouge is 10 minutes away".

Energy-Darshan-1981 After locating the report describing my meetings with the astrologer, I decided to search 'attributes of shiva'. The first article I found and the only one I read was dated March 12, 2012. On that date, I had been in Tiruvannamalai; an exact month before posting my first report from Varanasi; the 32nd anniversary of my taking sannyas with Bhagwan Shree Rajneesh, who named me Sampurna.

I was born on his 22md birthday. Bhagwan got enlightened on March 21st, 1953, which must have been the month I was conceived.

042215q55 I have decided to start chanting Om Namah Shivaya. I salute Shiva. I bow before the consciousness of the universe.


Tuesday, April 28, 2015
042815b 042215x37 Have been contemplating whether eyes are receptive instruments or projecting instruments or both; knowing, that whatever I see or perceive or conceive is an illusion.
Om Namah Shivaya!


Tuesday, Aril 28, 2015
010316i Sun-a 012514k-56 122515o49 Mainstream science teaches that the Sun is a dead ball of hydrogen and helium. Really, It is the manifestation of God and/or Pure Awareness on the physical plane.
As a small cloud can obscure the Sun, even a speck can blind one's sight; and, I want to see.
Om Namah Shivaya!

A Few More

1024p: Synchronicity: Tonight at dinner, Michel asked what car would I buy if the truck died – I replied ’56 or ’57 blue&white or red&white Chevy. Just downloaded (possibly) in one photo of ShadowStash.

A few years ago, the psychic I saw said my next lover would be named Juliet. Molly identifies with Juliet and has named the two butterfly angel lamps I gave her Juliet and a variation thereof.

6/18/15 520p: Went to the new taco place across the bank parking lot from Standing Stone (which is where we were heading). When I parked Molly’s car, right in front, the speedometer read 77,700 miles.

6/22/15 ~1155a: Looking at a forwarded link on another subject, I came across: Ceres: More Bright Spots and Unexplained Pyramid, 6/22/15.
Immediately, I was inspired to put out a 3wisemen email on pyramids. Did a search for pyramids on Mars and came across this article, also dated today: Is 'PYRAMID' found in NASA Mars video 'proof of alien civilisation on Red Planet?', 6/22/15.

Molly and I ended our reading at the end of ch.1 of the Prentice Alvin and the story of Cavil Planter and his wife who was in constant pain.

L. 9/24/15 [aim]

100515r For many hours today I researched holistic remedies for nervous breakdown and concussion to produce a good month long protocol for Molly. After coming across a couple of articles about it, the last item I listed for purchase and the only one I considered optional, was the hormone supplement Oxytocin. I'm not sure if I had ever heard of it before, but I found it intriguing for her to potentially give a try.
Later, this afternoon, no longer researching, but just looking for good images to post to Babar's, the above image presented itself.

10/29/15, 1230p
Night before last, I read Chapters 1&2 of Master of Self-Realization, talks of Nisargadatta's guru Siddharameshwar Maharaj. In the first chapter he says: "Self-Knowledge is the Knowledge about one's Self. Once we recognize who we really are, then automatically the determination is made regarding what is permanent and what is transient. Then, very naturally the renunciation of the impermanent and the acceptance of the permanent follows. Because of the transient nature of things, the fear of dissolution is inevitable. The one who is overpowered by this fear of dissolution, or death, continuously strives to see that some particular thing is not taken from him."

In Chapter 2 Siddharameshwar informs us that there "five types of dissolution. Two are at the level of the body, two at the level of the universe, and one through discrimination. They are:
1) Daily dissolution or the Dissolution of Deep Sleep
2) Dissolution through Death
3) Dissolution of the Creator and Creation (Brahma Pralaya)
4) Dissolution at the time of many Ages or Kalpas (Kalpa Pralaya)
5) Dissolution by Thought, or Discrimination

We had a South Beach Missions 508 Board conference call early this afternoon in which one of the three items discussed was "administrative dissolution" of recalcitrant organizations.

11/24/15, 12a
Gina’s email

121615i 1015a: Molly left after we smoked and she pulled the following note out of the blue windbreaker of mine she was wearing:
5p: Got Hierophant for going to Great American Pizza Company and Empress for going to Wild Goose. Went for the 2nd Venus card and got a free meal, because, as Stephanie said, Del comped me for the wrong steak I got the other day.
642p: My cookie ended standing up after breaking off a portion 2/3rds of the way through.

At 109a, Michel sent me Incredible Predictions of Baba Vanga, 12/19/10.
At 1139a, Silas sent me Did Baba Vanga, a blind Bulgarian clairvoyant, predict an invasion of Europe in 2016?, 12/8/15.

1/16/16 ~230p
011516r37 Silas and Alford dropped by for a little while. This is the picture of what was on my screen when they walked in:
Alford then proceeded to tell me the story of he and his beloved Indian motorcycle that ended in tragedy a long time back. His was red, like my beloved Honda 20 years ago.

2/10/16, 1106p:
~1045p: Somewhat spontaneously, Molly and I decided to drop the cloves on Friday night. We discussed things that may help us actually drop rather than wean or merely take a break. How much longer can I be in denial about my constant coughing and shortness of breath, hardly to mention whatever else the smoking may be aggravating or causing? Do I want to live and be vital and healthy? Yes, I do.
Another thought: To fix my world I must fix myself. Fix the smoking filth and whatever comes up around it or about it and there is at least a very good start.
~11p: Began reading Power of Now where we had left off. We arrived at p.54 at...
1106p: “How can we drop negativity, as you suggest? By dropping it. How do you drop a piece of hot coal that you are holding in your hand?”

2/15/16, 138p
“…arriving in a room in your brain, called ‘Central Control’..." as this picture (Chamber of Internal Dialogue) came up.

9/16/16, 850p: Knives
Molly came over with a gift of a couple of kitchen knives and four steak knives, all packed in hard plastic which requires strong scissors to get in to. We were doing just that when Michel knocked on the door and came in with a knife she just purchased that was also packed in hard plastic, asking if I had tools to unpack her knife.

1/24/17, 11a: No More Smoking
My last clove cigarette was late Sunday night. Molly's was last night. This morning Molly sent me the scans of Mom's quit smoking program she found late last night in a crochet magazine of Mom's that I gave Molly months ago.

012717v 1/30/17, 1239a: Earlier today, I came across and placed this image in my pending posting folder. Just prior to midnight, Molly and I smoked our very last clove cigarettes and then performed a ritual in which at the end we made and straddled a small bonfire in the driveway of the remaining cigarettes. Shortly after we finished, we came in and together organized and posted my pictures of the day. It was Molly who noticed that this image was an image of us a half hour or so before.

4/2/17: Birthdays and one anniversary
Maruti turns five in four days. Last year I forgot his birthday and I've thought of it several times in the past few days.
Today I talked with both Jonathan and Doug for the first time in a long while. Jonatham mentioned that his 10th wedding anniversary is this week; Doug's grandson turns one; and Spooky2's birthday was yesterday.

9/28/17 318p: Hanged Man
Emptying the bookshelf, I came across the four page XII Hanged Man Neptune card that Molly had saved from Maggie’s giveaways.
Had been pondering for a week. On 9/21/17 at 921p: I got this card when I asked what to do to minimize trouble with Michel?

11/1/17 250p: Black Pepper Oil
Came across this article which has just become the sole article posting on my Black Pepper Essential Oil page. A few days ago, Molly informed me that it's not good to cook black pepper and I replied that I didn't know that and added that black pepper is a valuable essential oil. Have flashed on black pepper oil a few times since.

1/10/18 347p: Just noticed that RJ’s ph# (last four) is my pin.

5/14/18 406p: Viva Paper Towels
Earlier this morning after noticing the empty paper towel holder for the umpteenth time, I thought: “I’ll check the internet… see what Viva costs.” By the afternoon the project idea evolved to all what I buy at the Co-Op and can I get them at Vitacost or Amazon? Having actually forgotten about the paper towels, I started in the bathroom. I found, indeed, that I could get my brands of soap, shampoo, conditioner at Vitacost. Next, I found that I could get my contact lens solution brand and many others at Amazon. This led me to checking what others what might be better. The first one I checked was Bio true. In the ‘Frequently bought together’ section were two other contact lense products and one Viva paper towels.

4/1/19, 438p: Dad's still around
This morning, Seligman mentioned that he was at the Work on Saturday night and while outside on the bridge he felt my Dad still very much around. Then, this afternoon, Marie told me that she was on the John Deere when Leigh came over yesterday and said Marie looks just like her Dad.

6/12/19, ~12a: 1033
Before sleep, I was reading in bed David Icke's book Everything You Need to Know... and got to this sentence: "The plan is for the world army to absorb all domestic police into one military/ police structure and the emergence of this is clear in the U.S. wherethe Pentagon has been transferring military vehicles and technology to even county police forces for either nothing or next to nothing through its 1033 program." I stopped there because that stunned me as I had had another 1033 earlier in the day though I couldn't remember what it was. I went to sleep knowing the folded page corner would eventually remind me of the synchronicity.
6/12/19, 147p: At the end of a phone converation, I asked amiably "Did I call you or did you call me?" She replied that she called me and I immediately recalled that at 133p I thought to call her, but didn't and she called a couple of minutes after that. I still haven't rediscovered what the original 1033 was, but I think it was in something I downloaded yesterday afternoon. Just did a search of downloads and didn't come up with anything. When it happened, one of the reasons I took note was because somehow it reminded me of the 1931 image I never sent my Dad.


Reading Raw on the 23rd.

video in 9th grade

Silas’s old girlfriend in Hawaii
Pippi Longstocking
Boy and string; riding a bike, learning spontaneity
Survived another day…
Lemme at least get these pictures out.
Good things and bad things happen through synchronicity.
psychic magic effecting universe play
tarot, iching, etc.

Time, Past, Future and the Eternal Now

Time is illusion. Past exists only in memory. Future exists only in anticipation.

Time doesn't exist in nature. It 'exists' only in the perceiving capacity of our minds.

The bundle of memories and hopes called the 'I', imagines itself existing everlastingly and creates time to accommodate its false eternity:

Mind only exists in time and time only exists in mind. Time only has two directions: past and future.

The duration of the present moment is beyond small. It is so tiny that it is nonexistent in the world of appearances. The present is not part of time. It is eternity. It is eternally beginningless and endless. It is reality.

In this present moment, there is no room for mind. There is only room for presence. I am now - I live entirely in the now. I am timeless being. I am safe here, because what is not, cannot touch what is.

I am in my own state (swarupa) timelessly in the now. To be, I need no past or future. Past and future are in mind only -- I am now.19

Causation means succession in time of events in space, the space being physical or mental. Time, space, causation are mental categories, arising and subsiding with the mind.14

It is the illusion of time that makes you talk of causality. When the past and the future are seen in the timeless now, as parts of a common pattern, the idea of cause-effect loses its validity and creative freedom takes its place.15

What begins and ends is mere appearance. The world can be said to appear, but not to be. The appearance may last very long on some scale of time, and be very short on another, but ultimately it comes to the same. Whatever is time bound is momentary and has no reality.18

Eternal is that which does not change with time. You cannot eternalise a transient thing -- only the changeless is eternal.22

Awareness is not of time. Time exists in consciousness only. Beyond consciousness where are time and space?28

Minds and bodies are in time and space, but I am timeless and spaceless.30

Time is a succession of moments; each moment appears out of nothing and disappears into nothing, never to reappear.54

The realised man is egoless; he has lost the capacity of identifying himself with anything. He is without location, placeless, beyond space and time, beyond the world. Beyond words and thoughts is he.75

Time is in the mind, space is in the mind. The law of cause and effect is also a way of thinking. In reality all is here and now and all is one. Multiplicity and diversity are in the mind only.84

Not dreaming, as an interval between two dreams, is of course, a Part of dreaming. Not dreaming as a steady hold on, and timeless abidance in reality has nothing to do with dreaming. In that sense I never dream, nor ever shall.86

Pure awareness is beyond the limitations of space and time.89

To the jnani it is obvious that nothing is born and nothing dies, nothing lasts and nothing changes, all is as it is -- timelessly.96

You cannot speak of a beginning of consciousness. The very ideas of beginning and time are within consciousness. To talk meaningfully of the beginning of anything, you must step out of it. And the moment you step out, you realise that there is no such thing and never was.96

Events in time and space -- birth and death, cause and effect -- these may be taken as one; but the body and the embodied are not of the same order of reality. The body exists in time and space, transient and limited, while the dweller is timeless and spaceless, eternal and all-pervading. To identify the two is a grievous mistake and the cause of endless suffering. You can speak of the mind and body as one, but the body-mind is not the underlying reality.108

The ordinary man is afraid to die, because he is afraid of change. The jnani is not afraid because his mind is dead already. He does not think: 'I live'. He knows: 'There is life'. There is no change in it and no death. Death appears to be a change in time and space. Where there is neither time nor space, how can there be death?126

The Supreme State neither comes nor goes. It is. It is a timeless state, ever present139.

You have enclosed yourself in time and space, squeezed yourself into the span of a lifetime and the volume of a body and thus created the innumerable conflicts of life and death, pleasure and pain, hope and fear. You cannot be rid of problems without abandoning illusions.143

Reality is essentially impersonal. First we must know ourselves as witnesses only, dimensionless and timeless centres of observation, and then realise that immense ocean of pure awareness, which is both mind and matter and beyond both.143

Your being a person is due to the illusion of space and time; you imagine yourself to be at a certain point occupying a certain volume; your personality is due to your self-identification with the body. Your thoughts and feelings exist in succession, they have their span in time and make you imagine yourself, because of memory, as having duration. In reality time and space exist in you; you do not exist in them. They are modes of perception, but they are not the only ones.144

Awareness becomes consciousness when it has an object. The object changes all the time. In consciousness there is movement; awareness by itself is motionless and timeless, here and now163

With desirelessness comes timelessness. I am timeless being. I am safe, because what is not, cannot touch what is.181

Your body is short of time, not you. Time and space are in the mind only. You are not bound. Just understand yourself -- that itself is eternity.182

Reincarnation implies a reincarnating self. There is no such thing. The bundle of memories and hopes, called the 'I', imagines itself existing everlastingly and creates time to accommodate its false eternity: To be, I need no past or future. All experience is born of imagination; I do not imagine, so no birth or death happens to me.182

Imagination is richly creative. Universe within universe are built on it. Yet they are all in space and time, past and future, which just do not exist.199

The real is not invented and cannot be destroyed. Hold on to that over which the mind has no power. What I am telling you about is neither in the past nor in the future. It is timeless and the total timelessness of it is beyond the mind.209

Once you understand that the false needs time and what needs time is false, you are nearer the Reality, which is timeless, ever in the now. Eternity in time is mere repetitiveness, like the movement of a clock. It flows from the past into the future endlessly, an empty perpetuity. Reality is what makes the present so vital, so different from the past and future, which are merely mental. If you need time to achieve something, it must be false. The real is always with you; you need not wait to be what you are.218

Even space and time are imagined. I too do not exist. All existence is imaginary. Pure being, filling all and beyond all, is not existence which is limited. All limitation is imaginary, only the unlimited is real.244

I know myself as I am -- timeless, spaceless, causeless.260

You speak about the flow of time, as if you were stationary. But the events you have witnessed yesterday somebody else may see tomorrow. It is you who are in movement and not time. Stop moving and time will cease. Past and future will merge in the eternal now.278

In your fevered state, you project a past and a future and take them to be real. In fact, you know only your present moment. Why not investigate what is now, instead of questioning the imaginary past and future? Your present state is neither beginningless nor endless. If is over in a flash. Watch carefully from where it comes and where it goes. You will soon discover the timeless reality behind it.281

The 'here' is everywhere and the now -- always. Go beyond the 'I-am-the-body' idea and you will find that space and time are in you and not you in space and time.326

Wherever you go, the sense of here and now you carry with you all the time. It means that you are independent of space and time, that space and time are in you, not you in them. It is your self-identification with the body, which, of course, is limited in space and time, that gives you the feeling of finiteness. In reality you are infinite and eternal.353

You, the self, being the root of all being, consciousness and joy, impart your reality to whatever you perceive. This imparting of reality takes place invariably in the now, at no other time, because past and future are only in the mind. ‘Being' applies to the now only. Time is endless, though limited, eternity is In the split moment of the now.361